


Teddybear

by Arika_the_Togepi



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: I write stuff in science class, I'm Sorry, M/M, Self Harm, So we all get it, and it's old so it's not good, attempted suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-25
Updated: 2015-05-25
Packaged: 2018-04-01 02:35:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,974
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4002637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arika_the_Togepi/pseuds/Arika_the_Togepi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Blaise leaves Harry, and he finds a teddy bear, do they get back together? What does Hermione have to do with it? Mention of Suicide and self harm.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Teddybear

I was going to do it. I was going to. I had the bright green shirt on that he said he loved on me, and I was wearing worn out jeans. In my pocket, was a small little box. In said box was a ring. I was going to ask Blaise Zabini to be my fiancé today.

Me. Harry Potter. After the war I had gone back to Hogwarts for sixth year. Then seventh year, after which, I got the job of Defence Against the Dark Arts Teacher.

But something changed in sixth year. I started going out with-men. And eventually that led me to Blaise. And then I realised he was serious like me, so we continued for three years. And now I was finally going to ask him to marry me.

I was just waiting for him to get home from his job at the ministry.

I heard the floo flare to life, and Blaise stepped out. He was wearing his work suit, all traditional black, with a white shirt, and black tie.

"Blaise!" I said running up to him and giving the tan Slytherin a hug. I did love him. Ever so much. "Your home. Happy Anniversary!"

My first sign was that he didn't hug me, back, or kiss me on the forehead like he use to. My second sign was that he didn't set his suitcase down, or take of his jacket.

He sighed. "Harry-"

"What's wrong?"

He didn't even say 'Happy Anniversary'.

"Us."

"Us?"

"Yes. I can't do this anymore Harry. I can't."

"Wh-what do you mean? Please tell me your not breaking up with me."

"I am though. Sorry Harry. But this is goodbye." He stepped into the floo again, and muttered Malfoy Manor.

I can't believe it. He left me. On our anniversary. When I was going to ask him to marry me.

The truth, it is a very bad thing. Mean. Snarky. Bitchy.

I wanted to cut my arms. I used to. I tried to commit suicide once. He was the one to find me. In the Room of Requirement. I wanted to cut again. I seriously did. After I had stopped for three years.

But he had charmed everything sharp not to cut my skin. And I can't take the charm off.

When I remembered something. Hidden in the closet. I stood up abruptly. Walking to the closet, I didn't bother wiping away the tears. I could walk through my apartments blindfolded, and besides, if I did new ones would just take their place.

In the closet, hidden in the corner underneath a lot of junk was a box. A very dusty box.

One that I pulled out. Inside were a lot of dusty blankets. I pulled them out and set them aside, they had no value.

No, what I was looking for was farther inside. After the last blanket was pulled away, I saw it.

A teddy bear.

It had no dust on it because of the blankets. I smelled it, and it did still smell like him.

He gave me the teddy bear. During sixth year, he had to go to the manor for Christmas, so he gave me this as an early present.

I loved it.

It was just a white plain teddy bear, it had a green bow around it's neck, and brown eyes.

That was pretty much it. Nothing super special. But the reason he gave it to me was so special.

After he had come back, it only held bad memories of when I had broken down because he wasn't there to help me through the nightmares.

I never got rid of it though. Oh no.

I had thrown in the very same box it was in now. With the blankets so anyone who looked in it would be discouraged, and to keep the dust off.

Now that he had left, I had another reason to use it. I didn't do anything else. Didn't move to the bed or a chair. Get ready for bed or anything.

I just tucked myself in a ball around the bear, and cried myself to sleep.

-APPARENTLY-I'M-A-LINE-

1 WEEK LATER

That's how Hermione found me later. She had a spare key- I remembered kind of how I closed off the floo's before I broke down.

She walked in on that sight. Me, sitting in the dark, tucked around a bear, thin, ragged, starving, sleepless.

She immediately sat me up and got me some food. She recognised the bear from sixth year. And knew what had happened.

"So he left?" All I could do was nod.

"How bad was it?"She asked.

"Bad. It was our anniversary. I was going to ask him-"

"Wait. Your anniversary? You've been like this a week? God. Here you should eat more."

"You've turned into Molly. My body is used to being starved, don't worry. But I was going to ask him to marry me Hermione. To marry me."

The spoon dropped from her hands. With the simple command of "Eat." she left.

Hermione POV:

Blaise Zabini is a bitch. Or an ass. Whatever.

How could he do that to Harry? They had been dating for three years! He even became friend with Malfoy for Christ's sake!

For whatever reason he broke up with him.

And I was going to find out why. A good thing both of them gave me spare keys to their houses huh?

When I walked into Zabini Manor, nothing seemed changed. The fire was lit in the living room, elves were bustling everywhere.

I ignored it all and walked- or ran- straight to Blaise's rooms.

Opening the door, I don't know if I can say I was more or less shocked of what I saw more than of what I saw at Harry's.

At least I had seen Harry break down before. And with the teddy bear, I could tell what had happened. I had never seen a Slytherin cry before-let alone completely break down.

The whole thing was just unheard of.

I know that they aren't as unfeeling as all us Gryffindores think (I am engaged to Pansy) but still.

Blaise was sitting on his bed, huddled in a ball, very similar to Harry's.

He didn't have a teddy bear however. If I hadn't been to Harry's apartments first, I wouldn't have know what was wrong.

I sat down on the end of the four poster bed (that was ironically in Gryffindore red and gold).

I sat Blaise up and murmured soft words of comfort into his ear.

He opened his eyes and looked at me.

I slapped him.

His eyes widened, and I almost slapped him again. But I refrained.

Normally he would have reached his hand up and rubbed his cheek. Then he would get very angry with me, and while he would never hit me, he would banish me from his manor and Harry's house.

Which was fine with me, because normally if I slap him, I do not want to be near him.

"What the fuck did you do?" I shouted at him.

He sighed, and unfurled from his ball. He was still wearing his Ministry suit and tie, but it was all crumpled.

"I couldn't continue with Harry. I was getting feelings, that I didn't understand, and so I did what all good Slytherins do. I closed them off completely. And that meant letting go of Harry. I didn't want to. But I had to. It's how I was raised."

I couldn't believe it. He was raised lie that no doubt. Both Pansy and Draco were also raised like that.

He was still being an idiot however.

"You idiot. Do you know how stupid that was? You could have talked to Pansy, or Draco or me about it! Do yo know that Harry has wanted to start cutting again? If it weren't for that charm, he would be dead by now! That is, if he didn't die from starvation! I found him today, wrapped in a ball like you, hugging that dumb bear you gave him in sixth year! This is the worse I've ever seen him!"

He sat there stunned. It was annoying the crap out of me.

I grabbed his shoulders and shook them "Say something!"

"Wow." I nodded for him to go on.

"Why would he be that bad? I knew he would be sad, but..."

"Because you idiot. You guys were going out for three years. Before that, his longest period of time was a week. And that guy just wanted him for his fame and money. It was your anniversary! He was going to ask to marry you!..Crap."

I hadn't meant to say that last part. It just kind of came out. Well, it was there now, can't take it back.

"What?" Oh the such idiotic responses of men. I sighed.

"I'm not meant to tell you, but he was going to ask to marry you. Now do you understand why it was such a big deal to him? So you are going to go in there, and apologize!"  
"But what if he won't forgive me? Or what if he's moved on? Or what if-"

"-Go or I'll tell Pansy!" Yeah that made him get moving. I sighed as he left the room.

Men were idiots sometimes.

Blaise POV:

"Harry?" I looked around the empty house. I found him in the bedroom, just how Hermione described. In a ball, curled around that teddy bear I gave him years ago.

I remember it well. I had to leave to the manor for Christmas. I knew that Harry had nightmares a lot. So I gave him the bear to try and make up for my absence.

As far as I'd known, he'd gotten rid of it.

But nope, he couldn't have. He had it now.

I wrapped my arms around him, and and muttered a few words into his ear.

His eyes opened, and I think he woke up, he might not have been asleep.

I stood up and backed away, hands in the air.

"Harry?" I asked, looking at his face. Shock. Disbelief. Hope?

"What?" His voice was terrible. Worse than a frog in the middle of winter.

"I want to apologize."

"Why did you do it? Why did you leave?"

"Because I was feeling something for you, that I had never felt for anyone before. I didn't know how to handle it. I wasn't raised to handle emotions Harry. I was raised to hide them. But I talked to someone about it, and I realised what it was.

I love you. I love you. I love you. I love-"

He reached up and put a finger too my lips.

"I love you too." He croaked out.

We kissed. And it was one of those long, sensual, loving, caring kisses, that you have to make one or both of you feel better.

"Harry?" I asked when we had come up for air.

"Hmm?" He said, turning around from where he was in my lap. We had moved to the bed.

"Why the teddy bear?"

"Because, it was like when you left, and I would have a horrible nightmare. It's like you were still there to protect me, and you always would be."

A little while later, he cleared his throat. "That reminds me. I don't know if this is the right time or not, but oh well.

Blaise, will you marry me?"

I nodded, crying now. "Yes I will most definitely marry you Harry Potter."

Hermione POV:

I watched as they apologized, and when Harry proposed. I knew the answer of course, but it was still sweet. I'm glad this kind of thing didn't happen everyday. Oh well.

I smiled. At least it ended happy.

And I apparated home to an opened arm Pansy, to tall her all about my eventful day.


End file.
